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Sexy, sassy and strutting their stuff
Marin women enjoy burlesque, stripping, pole dancing
By Vicki Larson, IJ reporter
On a Friday night in San Anselmo, 18 women are invoking the goddess. Before
them isn’t a New Age crystal or a statue of some Hindu goddess.
No, before them is a pair of black satin, 7-inch-high platform heels,
and the women, sitting on colorful mirrored and tapestry pillows in a
semicircle, are listening to Diane Greenberg talk about women’s
divine sensuality and the gift of sharing it with others. Of celebrating
one’s beauty. Of the sacredness of stripping.
Soon, there will be nudity — Greenberg’s and theirs —
and the women, curiosity aside, are nervous.
In Sausalito, a half-dozen women are gathered in a small room of Stage
Dor Dance Studio with little more than two floor-to-ceiling poles, a boombox
and walls of mirrors. “Oh, beautiful!” they gasp in unison
as Deborah Hodson — in a tight black lace top and slinky black tights
— executes a particularly sensual body wave, an undulation that
sends her hips, then her chest, trusting forward, her lips in a partial
pout.
An hour later, Shara Switala holds court in the larger dance room at Stage
Dor.
“OK, walk,” says Switala in a half demand, half purr.
And so a half-dozen 40- to 60-something women — gathered on a rainy
Tuesday night for a weekly burlesque class — walk, eyeing themselves
in the mirrors before them. But it’s not just any walk; it’s
a pointy-toed, hip-swaying, look-at-me, leg-stretching sassy strut. A
lady of the evening walk. And they are clearly loving it.
A funny thing has happened with female confidence-building and bonding.
It’s taken a decidedly erotic turn.
But it’s not just a soccer-mom, baby-boomer version of “Girls
Gone Wild.” Instuctors say they noticed a marked increase in interest
in the sensuality-fueled classes they’ve been offering in Marin
dance studios and gyms in the past year. It’s women’s liberation,
but not our mother’s liberation.
“Women are just two seconds away from awakening. We turn each other
on,” says Greenberg, a Novato resident and former professional dancer
who teaches “The Sacred Art of the Striptease.” “Women
have an appetite. We just don’t have permission.”
That is changing, not only in Marin but across the country. Suddenly,
striptease, pole-dancing and burlesque classes and revues are popping
up everywhere — from Los Angeles to Chicago to New York —
and in some seemingly unlikely places. Even the chic French department
store Galeries Lafayette has been offering free striptease lessons for
women plopping down their francs for dainty lingerie.
The classes are about being female, and they’re striking a chord
in women who are tapping into their naughty sides — aided by feather
boas, elbow-length black satin gloves and 5-inch platform heels —
to throw out old notions of how proper women behave and what their bodies
are “supposed” to look like. Many say it’s a variety
of female bonding as important and as fun as a bachelorette party or girls’
night out.
“People are trying to find different ways of venturing out and exploring
themselves. It’s becoming OK to be a sensual being,” says
Toni Dee, who’s been teaching women, including teens, how to strip
at the Bay Club Marin and at Gold’s Gym.
“For me, it’s a place of female comraderie. It’s a place
where you root for each other,” says Jennifer Solow, a Mill Valley
author who has taken strip and pole-dancing classes for years. “Where
else in the world can you go and say to another woman, ‘You look
so sexy doing that’?”
Greenberg, who has taught stripping strip for 10 years, says she has seen
a big jump in interest locally in the past two years. “We’re
all shy, we’re all self-conscious and we all doubt our self-worth
and self-beauty,” she says. “At some level, we bought into
our culture’s ‘you’re the wrong —’ and you
fill in the blank.”
Sensuality is innate, Greenberg says; her class just helps put women in
touch with it.
“At the end of the class they feel more about what they always already
were,” she says.
The women in Greenberg’s class came for different reasons. A few
talked about image issues. One was facing surgery and wanted to celebrate
her body before it is cut up. One expressed a desire to try her moves
out on a new lover. Not all got naked, but all fawned over and celebrated
those — from the buxom to the lithe — who got up to dance,
be it a minute or five.
“It’s fabulous when women own their natural beauty and are
willing to be coached with a little bit of attitude or get a few tips
by observing others,” Greenberg says. “This is one opportunity
to get a woman’s attention. Every woman loves a good costume party
and play dress-up.”
At Switala’s burlesque class, there’s lots of dress-up. The
comraderie is evident and the banter is risqué.
“I love this song. It’s so corny,” Switala says as a
classic bump-and-grind disc spins in the boombox.
“Did you say horny?” teases Leslie Klor of San Rafael, a lively
60-something.
Clearly, Switala’s students love the theatrics of the class as much
as she.
“I love the exotic dance but also love the playfulness of burlesque,
the posing and the walk,” says Switala, who has been dancing and
performing vaudeville since the late 1970s. “It is a way of putting
yourself out there without being overtly over the top.”
The Fairfax resident has been teaching the weekly hourlong Tuesday night
burlesque class at Stage Dor for nearly a year. Many come to the class
because they have a desire to perform, but they all walk away with a lot
more than that — a bit of stage presence and a sexy new way to walk.
For Betsie Diamond of Kentfield, Switala’s burlesque class is pure
freedom of expression. Diamond, who is in her 50s, loves the flirtaciousness
of burlesque. “Everyone seems so uptight these days, with the war
and the economy and the election. It’s more like an escape.”
But, she admits, “I’m a tease anyway.”
There’s lots of bumping and grinding at the Strip Teeze exotic dance
class Dee has been teaching since September at the Bay Club Marin and
since October at Gold’s Gym, both in Corte Madera. It’s been
a big hit at both locations; at Bay Club Marin, Dee had to move the class
to the basketball court to fit everyone in.
“A lot of women want to learn how to move and feel free with their
bodies,” says Dee, who stripped professionally for 20 years.
But nobody gets naked in her classes. First, they’re in gyms, so
that wouldn’t quite work, she says with a laugh. But mostly it’s
because the emphasis is on movement. “It’s about balancing
the body, more than sexual,” she says. “I teach them how to
move and feel sexy with their clothes on.”
That doesn’t mean she doesn’t use the usual props —
boas, high heels, gloves and belts.
It’s a great workout as well, says Dee, a former professional bodybuilder
and judge for the International Federation of Bodybuilders. “Your
muscles are sore the next day. They’re using muscles they’ve
never used before. The whole movement is based in deep-core workout. It’s
not just wiggling your butt around.”
But that butt-wiggling is pretty helpful too, she’s discovered.
“A lot of women don’t even know how to walk sexy,” Dee
says. “There’s a whole art to the strut.”
Dee says the confidence that comes from knowing how to move her body helps
in many areas. “I feel better in my business, I feel more empowered
as a woman and I feel better with my partner.”
It isn’t about sex.
“It’s about empowering you as a woman, not about going out
and getting laid,” Dee says.
Anything that helps a woman feel good in her skin is a good thing, says
Lonnie Green, who is an intimacy counselor in Marin and the Tahoe area.
“I think a lot do (feel good), but not in front of a judgmental
audience,” be it parents, lovers, friends, other women, strangers.
Strip classes can give women “full permission to let go. ... It
could be extremely liberating.”
Green, who lives in Mill Valley, has known Greenberg for many years and
has hired her to do one-on-one strip work with some of her clients. “A
woman who’s really in touch with the pleasure of her body”
can bring that energy into her relationship and revitalize it, Green says.
“Women are so uptight” because of media images, she says,
that they can’t even tap into their own inner beauty “even
if they have a luscious body, or, like me, too thin a body.
“There’s nothing more beautiful than a woman who’s happy,”
Green says.
Joan Heartfield of Maui, who is a psychologist and leads an annual “Divine
Feminine Mystery School” in Marin, agrees. Greenberg taught a striptease
class at Heartfield’s seminar last year and it was such a hit that
she’ll teach one again for her in Tiburon this June. Thankfully,
Heartfield says, women are finally being allowed to express their natural,
exotic energy. “The more confident women are with their bodies,
the more fun they can have. The more confidence, ease and joy.”
That wasn’t why Delores Kilgariff was drawn to Dee’s class
at Gold’s Gym. “I always felt comfortable with my body,”
says Kilgariff, a 56-year-old Mill Valley resident who stays active with
tennis, running and lifting weights. But, she says, “This makes
me feel even more so.
“Everybody just feels so sexy,” says Kilgariff, who has taken
the class several times. “I have a different attitude toward everything.
You can just let yourself go. It’s so nice.”
And to do that in the company of other woman is especially powerful, says
Claudia Six, a San Rafael sexologist who has taken strip classes not only
to aid in her work but for “my own eroticism and for fun.
“You see other women and they all have an innate eroticism and it
looks different — large dykes, petite blondes and your average housewife.
It validates everyone’s eroticism. It’s fun and it puts you
more in touch with your body,” she says. “It’s permission
that it’s OK to move this way.”
Virginia Simpson-Magruder knows how to move. She’s been dancing
for some 15 years. But when she was cast in a dance show last year as
a pole dancer, the Novato resident realized she had to get educated fast.
She took some classes through S Factor, the cardio workouts inspired by
striptease and pole dancing created four years ago by actress Sheila Kelley
(classes are offered a few times a year at Red Dot’s San Francisco
location). “I just got hooked on it,” says Simpson-Magruder,
who now teaches drop-in pole dancing classes with Lane Driscoll on Tuesdays
at Stage Dor.
She agrees that it’s not about sex, although slithering and shimmying
up and down the pole definitely is sexy. But the pole’s just a prop.
“I’m not into all the erotic stuff. I’m into the playfulness
of it. Women are pulled to pole dancing but the image that’s connected
to it is the eroticism of the strip clubs, which is not a pretty thing.”
Just like in stripping or bawdy burlesque, she says, “you have to
let go of your inhibitions or work through them,” Simpson-Magruder
says.
Adds Driscoll, “It’s really transformational.”
Solow, 41, who loves pole-dancing so much that she bought a portable one
for her home, calls them “monkey bars for women” — once
women can get past the image of it being “slutty and for bimbos.”
Solow’s 5-year-old daughter and 8-year-old son are into it, too.
“I’m sure it sounds very weird to someone who has preconceived
notions of pole-dancing,” she says, “but my kids make up moves
like ‘The Froggy’ ... It’s like skiing. There’s
tricks to learn and to invent. It sounds provocative and naughty but it’s
fun. You get addicted.”
Hodson, a 48-year-old Mill Valley resident with a variety of dance experience,
was drawn to the pole-dancing class out of curiousity. “It took
more nerve than I expected,” she says. But by the end of her first
class, she saw herself in a new way. “This pushes the envelope a
bit, dancing for others and being appreciated. To have that female audience
is good, too. It makes you feel sexy.”
And feeling sexy, the instructors say, is different than being sexualized.
Six, the San Rafael sexologist, says these types of erotic classes help
women of all ages set boundaries and feel safe in their sexuality. She
says many women think that “if they show a little of it, someone
might get interested and they won’t know how to handle what they
started.” The classes give women an understanding of their own eroticism
so it’s not “something that they hand over to a guy. They
can move the energy for themselves.”
Dee, who has has girls as young as 16 in her class, says the young gals
come into the class giggling, but they leave learning a powerful lesson.
“I’m not trying to advocate sex to anyone, but they’re
aware.” Feeling confident in your body and about yourself helps
the teens have control, learn when to say no and when to say yes because
“it’s my decision,” she says.
For Debby Graham of Tiburon, Dee’s strip class has been powerful.
“It’s like opening your inner goddess,” says Graham,
43. “When I say ‘opening your inner goddess,’ I mean
I now walk around with confidence in everything I do. It’s strange.
It’s amazing. I have a different outlook with men. It’s this
little secret that I know.”
Vicki Larson can be reached at vlarson@marinij.com. If you bump, grind
or strip Diane Greenberg will be teaching The Scared Art of the Striptease
for women April 14, 7 to 10 p.m. in Novato, $45. Call 898-7510. She’ll
teach a women-only class May 6 at World Dance Fitness, at 40 Greenfield
Ave., San Anselmo from 7 to 10 p.m. $40 in advance, $45 at the door. Call
457-8787.
Greenberg also offers private classes. Call 898-7510 or e-mail
Diane.
Toni Dee teaches exotic dance classes at the Bay Club Marin, 220 Corte
Madera Town Center, Fridays from 7:15 to 8:30 p.m. Four-session classes
are $80 for members, $120 for guests. Drop-in classes are $25 members,
$35 guests. Call 945-3000 for the next session.
Dee teaches exotic dance classes once a month at Gold’s Gym, 10
Fifer Ave., Corte Madera. Free for members. Call 927-4653. Dee also offers
private classes. Call 454-8944, www.tonideefiteness.com.
Shara Switala’s Theatrical Burlesque class is offered Tuesdays,
8:30 to 9:30 p.m. at Stage Dor Dance Studio, 10 Liberty Ship Way No. 340,
Sausalito. $15 a class. Call 339-1390, www.stagedor.com.
Virginia Simpson-Magruder and Lane Driscoll offer drop-in pole-dancing
classes from 6:30 to 7:30 p.m at Stage Dor Dance Studio, 10 Liberty Ship
Way No. 340, Sausalito. Beginners classes are the first, third and fifth
Tuesdays of the month, intermediate classes are the second and fourth
Tuesdays. $15 a class. Call 339-1390; www.stagedor.com.
Simpson-Magruder will also bring a portable pole to your home for a private
party. Call 827-2827; http://virginia.apolelotoffun.com.
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